Tips on how to survive the holidays without getting too stressed out

For some Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year, but for others, it can be stressful.

Dr. Michel Lariviere is a psychologist in Sudbury and he has some tips on how to survive the holidays without getting too stressed out.

"I think remaining flexible with our traditions is not a bad way to start," Lariviere said.

"And not feel like we're prisoners too, but rather, that we have some influence on how we want them to play out."

Perfectionism can be a stressor during the holidays, he said.

"When people talk to me about stress, that's usually where it's centred, on trying to make everything just, just right, and just perfect and just like how it always has been," Lariviere said.

"And for a lot of people, it can make things unpleasant kind of paradoxically making it worse rather than better."

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When it comes to argumentative family members, using a bit of diplomacy can help.

"Because there are some obligations that maybe we feel we can't get away from," he said.

"At the same time, what I also might suggest to some people I see is they don't necessarily have to endure too much antagonism or incivility at Christmas if that's what's going to happen. People have a say also in choosing who they want to spend most of their time with."

Feeling connected

Lariviere said feeling connected to others can help feelings of loneliness, especially around the holidays.

"We could be surrounded by people but feel terribly lonely and that's because we don't feel connected necessarily with the people around us," he said.

"At the same time, we can be very much alone but feel deeply connected with people who may not be there over the holidays. And I think it's avoiding social isolation and feeling connected that makes all the difference."

Calling to check up on or visiting people who may be alone or experiencing loneliness can help others feel connected.

"It's actually good for our health as well," Lariviere said.

"Maybe go visit someone in a chronic care type facility or a neighbour who we know is going to be alone and offer them maybe some goodwill and an invitation."

He said, sometimes, the gesture itself can go a long way.

With files from CTVNewsNorthernOntario.ca anchor Tony Ryma