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Best friend of Sudbury murder-suicide victim speaks out

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Friends of a Greater Sudbury family who were found dead last weekend are sharing fond memories of the family, even as they deal with feelings of loss.

"I'm at a numb feeling right now," Conrad Rousselle told CTV News in a phone interview Wednesday afternoon.

Rousselle said he is working through grief and shock after his best friend, 46-year-old Brian Desormeaux, was found dead in his Coniston home along with his 43-year-old wife Janet and 17-year-old son Ashton on Sunday night.

Brian (left), Ashton (centre) and Janet Desormeaux (right) died in a murder-suicide Sunday night, Sudbury police say. (Facebook)

 "I feel like they were my family," he said.

Details about the deaths are scarce, but Sudbury police said they are investigating the incident as a murder-suicide and are waiting on the results of the autopsies to confirm the causes of death.

BONDING OVER ARM WRESTLING

Rousselle said he first met the Desormeaux family in 2008 at an arm wrestling tournament in North Bay where Brian was competing and they became fast friends.

At the time, he said Brian was an amateur who was so strong he was beating professionals.

Brian Desormeaux was part of the core members of the Rock City Reapers Arm Wrestling Club. (Facebook)

Rousselle describes Brian as a family man who brought his wife and children everywhere. Ashton was just two years old when Rousselle met him and "he wanted to do what his daddy was doing," so they would hold him up to the arm wrestling table. Later, he would join in competitions.

Ashton and Brian Desormeaux at arm wrestling competition posted in 2017. (Facebook)

The two men along with two others formed the Sudbury arm wrestling team called Rock City Reapers and the community has grown to about 25 members who all train together.

Brian was so dedicated, within two weeks he got a tattoo of his new team logo, Rousselle said.

Brian and Rousselle recently organized the 7th annual Sudbury Arm Wrestling Championship that saw 95 competitors from all over Ontario flexing their muscles at a local sports bar.

Brian Desormeaux (right) competing in recent Sudbury arm wrestling championship tournament. Oct. 22/22 (Facebook)

The Desormeaux family hosted the tournament after-party at their house Oct. 22, which was the last time Rousselle said he saw them.

"If I would have known that was the last night…," he said.

"(Brian) brought me back home that next morning."

LEANING ON EACH OTHER

Members of the club gathered together to mourn the family's passing Monday night.

"It’s unfortunate times like this that seem to bring together people," Rachel Wade said in a post on the club's social media page Tuesday morning.

"We all needed time to talk, reflect and share stories of arm wrestling about the Desormeauxs."

She went on to describe each of the three family members in the post.

"Brian was not only an arm wrestler but a friend, role model, teacher, promoter and like a dad to many of the younger pullers. He had a tough-looking exterior but was a truly nice guy underneath. He cared about his family and the sport of arm wrestling. He provided contacts for many of us to get jobs and supported anyone who asked or needed help. He was a good community member who helped out anyone who needed it. Brian, your enthusiasm and dedication for the sport will be heavily missed," Wade said.

"Janet, your smile, passion and dedication to your family and their endeavours was contagious. Those who met you, and your wing woman Bessie, knew your heart was always in the right place. Your overwhelming love for your children and husband was hard to deny. You gave your family all of you…something you couldn’t ask for more in a mom and wife."

Rousselle said Janet loved to decorate for every season and occasion and that the house always smelled wonderful and the food was always plentiful.

Ashton was a student at St. Charles College and the school board said it is providing support and resources to grieving staff and students.

"Ashton, you were the next generation of arm wrestling greats. Your passion as a child and youth for the sport is what we all want from our younger pullers. You were fierce and fiery on the table and proved that you could back up your words. I have personally watched you grow up from a two-year-old rug rat to a teen who shouldn’t be messed with on the table," Wade said.

TAKE MENTAL HEALTH CONCERNS SERIOUSLY

"I would like everyone to know to treat mental health with the utmost seriousness," Rousselle said.

"We need to be more charitable, always keep an open mind for those who we don't understand. Mental illness is a real thing and people need to set their pride aside and seek help."

The club plans to raise money for the local mental health association in honour of the late family.

"They just truly, honestly loved one another more than anything else," Rousselle said.

Additionally, the club plans on competing in the Canadian Armwrestling Championships in Cape Breton next year in honour of the Desormeaux.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, there is help available. Find local services here.

Correction

Organizers in the community of Coniston told CTV News plans for a candlelight vigil have been cancelled at the request of the family, so details have been removed above.

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